Lost Without You
by ellegrrrrl
Summary: Light/L Yaoi. Light is evil, but somehow he falls in love with the enemy. They become lovers, but will Light give up all his power,just to be with L?
1. Summary

**THis is a Yaoi between Light Yagmai and L. Go away all the people who don't like Yaoiness or Fangirls.**

Light Yagami is a straight A+ student with a bright future ahead of him but all that changed when he found a deathnote and met a shinigami. I found a deathnote and all this power in my hands would help me and I would make a new world with nothing bad in it and no evil. Yet there was one person standing in my way, L they called him. Not know by his real name, he thought me to be Kira and threw me behind bars with the second Kira Misa.

WARNING:::  
May contain boysex if you don't like slashes gay boys deathnote or sex scenes go away now!

~DISLAIMER~  
I know the manga is not at all like this but who cares..I hate light for what he did but I can't stop writing as it's a cool story to write but I'll always hate light and love L.  
I DO NOT own light or l or any deathnote characters I wish I did! HOWEVER I do own this story don't copy !!


	2. A Mysterious Visitor

**First Chapterrr! This is my first time ever writing a Yaoi! Hope it goes okayy ******

**This starts when L suspects Light to be Kira, and has locked him up. This chapter has...lime? Yaoi? I don't know, it's fanfiction. Leave us little Yaoi FanGirls in peace!**

Chapter1

~Lights POV~  
My cell was pitch black, no movement. Only me huddled in the far corner...earlier that day i had pleaded my innocence but no believed me. Then there was a *click* as the door shut. What did this person want? It was the middle of the night. "Who a-"I got cut off by cool soft lips forced onto mine. I fought the urge but melted into the kiss. This person picked me up and lent me against the wall. I put my legs around their waist and deepened the kiss.

I lifted my arms but then forgot that they were chained together so they hung just near my belly...at my sides. This persons tongue slowly traced my lips, asking for entry, which I denied. They broke the kiss and began to undo my shirt while kissing my neck. They found my sweet spot and started to lick, suck and nibble it. I resisted moaning, letting out a small whimper but then they bit down on it and I let out a long moan. Not being able to contain it any longer.

They took this opportunity and slid their tongue into my mouth and explored every inch of it, they slowly broke the kiss and murmured in my ear "I knew you couldn't keep it in for long." and they went back to my sweet spot, being a little rougher this time, biting down harder and licking away all the blood made from the cut on my sweet spot.

At this I let out a string of moans which pleased my visitor. "I love it when you moan" They said as they began to explore my stomach with their mouth. (All this kissing and licking is turning me on but i can't like this...it's like rape) As they reached my pant line they began to place soft kisses right where my pants started, making me moan harder and causing my pants to get tighter and tighter. (If you know what i mean :P)

Then they began to unzip me. They pressed their mouth to mine and they slid down my jeans. Then they saw my (you know) and they said "Enjoying this ain't we!" Then they started on my pants. At this I pulled away (I don't want to go too far with someone i don't know!)

"NO! PLEASE! I don't know who you are, and not here there are cameras! With night vision!" I yelled.

"But I switched off the cameras but if you are bothered I will reveal myself tomorrow night. You might not like who I am but goodnight Light and try to sleep!"They said. Before I could reply they gave me a quick peck and swept to the door without a backward glance. I pulled my shirt tighter around my body and I climbed into bed.

It could of been either Ryuzaki or Misa, but why?

Not thinking of anyone else I fell asleep and all I dreamed about what the nights events

~The Next Day~  
Nobody today had shown feelings towards me, I couldn't leave my cell so people came to me. The only cheery one was Ryuzaki (I know in the anime that they spoke to Light over a speaker system but in this I want him to have visitors!). All the others told me about the investigation and how it was going (Not very good no new suspects). Ryuzaki on the other hand chatted to me about a new flavored cake he had found and how he had taken a shine to it.

He had a huge smile on his face which I had never realized before. (I knew Ryuzaki was always this happy so they were no change in his behavior so it couldn't be him.) So I smiled back at him and happily chatted to him about favorite foods.

~5 Hours Later~  
It was late at night and I had fallen asleep only to be woken up again a few hours later by a soft *click* as the door shut and a key turning in the lock. This is when I finally found out who I shared those passionate kisses with...this is when I find out who this mysterious person is.

Who was it?

The clock struck 12, it was midnight...

**Hahaha, and so it is over and done with!**

**Hope you liked it, my first chapter of my first Yaoi ******

**I'm proud. I thought I'd leave it here, so you could get a taste, maybe review it. And I'll give you a treat next chapter!**


	3. The Truth

**Another chapter, mwhahaha! I hope you like it, lots! Well, I'm going to keep this short. Here you are!**

Chapter 2

~Lights POV~

As the clock chimed slowly my visitor came to me, hugged me close and a quick kiss. They let go of me and walked to the door and out of it, were they turned on the light, they came back in. I couldn't see who it was still because they had a hood covering their face. They slowly walked towards me and took down the hood and they faced me.

I gasped; I was so shocked I fell back onto my bed where I shouted "OMFG!!! Ryuzaki it's you!!" At this point Ryuzaki (or "L") walked to the door and opened it "I knew you wouldn't understand. I knew you would just laugh in my face!" he screamed at me, tears pouring down his face. But he silently cried not wanting to attract attention.

"What do you mean? I would never do that to you! NEVER! DO YOU HEAR ME! I like you like you like me" I calmly said as i walked over to him. I tried to wipe away the tears he hadn't taken notice of but I couldn't as the chains that held me together restrained this. I pulled Ryuzaki back into my cell and closed the door. I sat him on my bed and I joined him.

I tried to hug him but it was no use...my chains wouldn't let me do anything, so I gave him a little peck on his very wet cheek and said "Ryuzaki please could you take off my handcuffs, they really hurt and I wanna hold you tight in my arms and wipe away your tears" He just looked at me like he couldn't understand me but slowly he reached into a hidden pocket and pulled a small silver key."You really mean that?" he whispered.

But he didn't need an answer, he could tell by the look on my face and the truth in my eyes I meant it. A smile lit up his face and he unlocked my handcuffs. I threw them down to the floor and wrapped my arms round Ryuzaki, a bear hug, I was so fast my arms were a blur. I slid off my t-shirt (No rudey thoughts please.) and mopped up his tears which were slowly stopping.

"One question though, does this mean we are gay (Hehe Lights an idiot!)" I asked. "Weeeeell I never thought of it that way but yeah babe we sure are!" he answered back. I cupped my hands around his face and lifted it to my own. I lightly kissed his lips and then I kissed harder (still no t-shirt ^_^ Rudey thoughts now welcome) and he wrapped his arms around me and I did the same. Our tongues explored each other's mouths yet here was no fight for dominance. My hands explored his body as his did the same.

I curled my legs around his waist and deepened the kiss (bear in mind it's the middle of the night). We both laid down, side by side, arms and legs tangled together. I will free you as soon as I can" he said.

"As long as I am with you I don't care where I am and what is happening!" I answered back as I kissed him goodnight, or good morning as dawn was approaching.

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I'm not going to fast with this all I am? I just don't know what to put in the chapters...but anyway. I hope you're enjoying it! If you've got any ideas I'll gladly take them!

Sorry it's really short :[

It's just it's hard to write with Writers Block.


	4. Freedom

**Another chapter, bear in mind all these chapters are pre-written before I lost my notebook and the frigging writers block kicked in. Hope you enjoy it!**

Chapter 3

~Lights POV~

I was told I was supposed to be serving thirty days in my cell...but the very next day I were freed as where Misa and my Father, but I was only free on one condition; Me and Ryuzaki had to be chained together 24/7. This didn't impress Misa at all, she wanted some alone time with me but now Ryuzaki had to be there with us. She went off in a huff when she heard this leaving me and Ryuzaki in fits of laughter with our arms entwined (no one was near and nothing could be seen). When I was first told this plan I was ecstatic, me and Ryuzaki could be together properly but then I found out about all the cameras, one in every room plus sound bugs. This meant no alone time and we couldn't have a proper relationship.

But we were happy at least we got some quality time together, our day's boring. We'd wake up and get dressed; yes we looked at each other. (Yummy.) We'd have breakfast, something sugary covered in chocolate or cream. We'd watch the news and be on the computers looking for signs of Kira. But we'd sometimes mess about if it was a slow day. We'd have to go on dates with Misa, which was so fricking boring I'd rather eat my own head then go on them! But then, we'd come home and my and Ryuzaki would curl up into each other's arms.

~A Week Later~  
A week of doing that shit all over again soon got boring so we decided to scrap all our plans and we goofed off every day. Running around the tower screaming like loons and laughing, just having fun basically. We only checked for Kira once a day and for the rest of the day we just went mad, not caring what really happened. Often we would sneak off to share a passionate kiss in a secret corner or cupboard, savoring every moment we had together. We swam in the pool, played tennis and had awesome matches and we made cookies, cake, anything sweet you could think of. It really was perfect. Like nothing could get to us, tear us apart or mess it all up.

Life like this was awesome and very funny. Ryuzaki really was a little kid when he let all the excitement take over and I think I loved him for it. Life like this went on for a couple of months but Kira kept on killing, making a perfect world he called it. This put me and Misa of the suspects list for good. (Of course we all know who the real Kira is but we never find out who killed those people).

When we went on dates it was strange, all three of us went and it was like a three-way date. But often it felt like Misa wasn't there and it was just me and my beloved Ryuzaki. No one knew of our special secret and we had kept it a secret for 3 months and we felt like we could keep it longer. If my family found out I would be shammed, my family would lose everything because of me and I would never be able to see Ryuki (1) again. He would be stripped of his title and he might be sent back to his home, never to return, if that happened I don't think I would be able to live and see another day again. I'm practically lost without him.

Nobody suspected a thing, not even Misa. When it came to the cameras only Ryuki's friend watched them Watri, he didn't take much notice of us, like he had accepted us being together. He was the only friend Ryuki had and he was almost like a father to him, because Ryuzaki was an orphan and Watri didn't want to let him go, he had nowhere else to go.

Luckily there were no cameras in bedrooms and bathrooms, to give people privacy which is what we wanted. If we weren't in a bedroom/bathroom we would be huddled in tight corners, dark spaces anywhere hidden from the cameras, kissing and savoring each moment together like it was the last one on earth. We had got very intimate in the last few days.

We both wanted something but we couldn't have it. It was much too risky and if we were caught only the God in heaven and the Shinigami in hell knew what would happen. They wanted this for a long time, a chance to prove their love for each other and to finally become soul mates once and for all. It was my birthday in 2 days and I wasn't expecting much, maybe presents, cake and a kiss from Ryuki. But Ryuzaki had something different in mind, a surprise party! We could finally prove ourselves to each other on that night while everyone else was busy. But would they both go through with it? Would we be scared or excited...? We can only hope we wouldn't get caught...

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(1)-Light's pet name for Ryuzaki

I don't like this one too much. I still like the couple, but this chapter doesn't do it for me. I don't know why. Well, i hope you still like it! May have some more for you soon!


	5. Surprise

**Another chapter, I like this, to be honest. A bit of lime a bit of lemon, i don't know which. This took me ages to write, it took like a week. But enjoy it!**

**But I had to make Light's father evil in this, the chapter needed a twist!**

Chapter 4

With only one day left till Light's birthday Ryuzaki had something big to plan. Of course Light didn't expect anything, maybe something of his mum and dad and maybe a kiss or whatever from Ryuki, but no. On the day of his birthday he was awoken by Ryuzaki, who wrapped his arms around him and gave him a big kiss. Light wanted to go back to bed but no, Ryuki had other ideas! He pulled him out of bed and dragged him into the shower, where they had a sex-filled _steamy_ make out session filled with moans. When they finally got out of the shower and got dried they went into the lounge, and like every room in the penthouse, it was filled with candy. Most surfaces brightly colored. And they just messed out, tickling fights and throwing jelly beans at each other. The investigation crew had never seen the pair of them act so childish. As the days went past Ryuki was trying had to make Light's surprise perfect, in every single way.

When his birthday actually did arrive, Ryuki was so worn out yet so excited. They were on one of the many balconies and Ryuzaki whipped out a blind fold. One of the big unused halls had been decorated and they awaited their birthday boy. He led a blind Light to the hall and slowly pulled the blindfold off. Everyone was there, old friends, family and even teachers, which was kinda strange and a live band which went by the name of **Dir En Grey****.** Food piled high as was the presents. People were having a good time and of course there were no handcuffs now that would be really strange.

He got many presents, including and iBook, lots of CDS, lots of clothes and a few books. But what he didn't like was the big kiss from Misa, as soon as she kissed him; he fled back to Ryuki and wiped his mouth on his sleeve till it was sore. _"My lips only belong to you, baby"_ he whispered in Ryuzaki's ear. He smirked to himself and turned to face Light, a mischievous grin on his face. He grabbed his hand and led him out the room and into a nearby by bathroom. In there Ryuzaki jumped onto the sink and pulled Light towards him. He stuck his tongue in his mouth before you could say "RAWR". He didn't really need permission; he tongue wandered his lovers mouth, as his hands wandered his body and found his belt bucket. And he slowly began to tug on it, as if asking for permission.

"Noo. Please don't baby. Someone could hear us and we'd be ruined_."_ Light said in disappointment. Ryuzaki let his hands drop to his lovers thighs, where he slowly began to rub. Light's moans filled the small steamy enclosed bathroom, and it began to get hotter and hotter. Their passionate make-out session getting heated by the second.

_"_But baby, I want you so much_._" Ryuzaki said sadness in his voice. But Light didn't reply he just began kissing him harder.

"I want you too, maybe tonight. Cause I can't stand the tension", Light said breathily, his eyes filled with lust love. Ryuki's hands wandered down to his belt buckled once more and his cool fingers quickly undid it and threw it on the floor, the hard metal banging against the floor tiles. Light began to moan once more at Ryuzaki's dominance. Ryuki slipped his hands into his lovers boxers and slowly began rubbing Light's length through the material of his boxers. Light moaned at this touch and he slowly began to get hard. I plunged my hands into his boxers and started to stroke him. My long cool fingers lightly stroking him.

His moans got louder and louder which really turned me on. He began to get rougher as I let me know I was reaching my climax. All of a sudden I emptied my load into his hands and screamed his name "RYUKIIII" and I flopped down into his waiting arms. He washed his hands and then cuddled up to me while I regained my strength. He slowly calmed himself down and his hard on flopped down. Then with a smirk on his face he led me to the door, gave me a quick peck and said. "Happy birthday baby" and we ran back to the hall, nobody noticing we were missing, all accept for Lights father.

"Now boys, where have you been, we haven't seen you for half an hour!" he bellowed at us. We both looked at each other but before I even began to think Ryuki replied.

"Sorry Mr. Yagami but Light wasn't feeling very well so I took him to the bathroom because I thought he was going to be sick. But he's feeling much better; he must have eaten something bad." He said. Flashing those puppy eyes at him, my father forgiving him instantly. Nobody could refuse those eyes, not even me. My father nodded at us and walked away.

I let out a huge sigh and said "See what I mean darlin, he could have caught us off guard! We must stay on the tips of our toes around my father" and Ryuki nodded at me, before skipping off to dance, what a retard, I must like love him, I put up with him every day, and I smiled to myself.

~2 Hours Later~

It was now 11pm and the party had ended, Light carried a very tired Ryuki upstairs to their room, and he slowly began to undress him. My fingers trailed up his legs and I too got undressed and I climbed into bed. But Ryuki's eyes snapped open, he wound his arms around my chest and he laid his head again my shoulder, our bodies melded together, made for each other. I started stroking his cheek and my other hand trailing loosely in his hair. How soft and silky it was, I loved it. We fell asleep in each other arms.

But I had a nightmare, my father had burst in on me and Ryuki while we were making out and he was horrified, I just hoped that would never happen. But I heard the door creak open, we were in each other's arms, and it was most likely my father to visit us. I could do nothing but wait and he observed the scene that lay before him. He gasped "What the fuck is this? My son...gay? Something must be done!" and he swept from the room, slamming the door behind. Ryuzaki, who was laid in my arms, woke from his deep sleep.

"What the hell is going on?" he whispered, almost silently. But he looked at me and the tears pouring down my cheeks and he whispered "They've found out haven't they. What will we do?" Tears formed in his eyes. I didn't know what to say so I just held him close. These may be our last few hours together so we had to spend them well. But we eventually drifted into an uneasy sleep, our faces wet from tears and our eyes sore from crying, wrapped in each other's limbs.

~The Next Day~

A banging on our door awoke us from our dreams. We both leapt up, into each other. Our faces still red from the night before. Ryuki looked into my eyes, sorrow and guilt filled them. He thought this was his entire fault. Only because he had made the first move, but I let him, so we both had the blame. But his eyes also had longing and something that made me think **I'm never going to see him again!** But I didn't want to believe it. But the banging made it worse and my father burst through the door, wood and splinters flying everywhere.

"Step away from my son you fucking fag, you brainwashed him into loving you. He'll never love you back and you'll never see him **again!**" my father screamed.

But we ignored him and locked our lips together, making out. Tongues everywhere. But my father ripped me from him, our mouths breaking apart. Us both sobbing our hearts out, limbs flailing towards each other, never to be intertwined again. He dragged me down the stairs screaming at me, but all I could hear was the screams of my lover.

"LIGHT COME BACK! I FUCKING LOVE YOU. NEVER FORGET ME, I'LL SEE YOU AGAIN. LIIIIIGHHHHTTTT!!!!! I LOVE YOU!" and I could hear him sobbing.

How it broke my heart. It tore me in pieces. My fucking father had done this to me. Ryuki was my one and only, he had my heart. I was dead without him and I don't think I would ever love again. I was lost...without him

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I hope you enjoyed this, I like this chapter.

But I still have a feeling that I'm rushing this.

I promise to include lots more, fruity things. Maybe next time it will be strawberries and oranges rather than lemons and limes. REVIEW :]


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